So I’ve decided to move back. I’m really nervous and a little bit anxious but excited to see what the future holds. I’m grateful that I only came to Arizona with clothing and books, meaning I won’t have to pack much. I’ll be out of here around the end of December or early January.
It’s funny, when I finally decided that I was going to move on, I got a call for an interview in Visalia, about a 45-minute drive from Fresno. I was ecstatic! The job is in a hospital doing recreation therapy in a sub-acute medical unit. It’s a lot different from the psychiatric population I am used to, but I’ve been researching what types of recreation therapy I can use with this population so semi-confident for the interview. It’s at 1pm this Friday.
Since I got the call, I’ve kind of been on cloud nine, until this weekend, when I hit up my closet and realized that I have absolutely nothing to wear for the interview. This in itself is strange for me. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve gotten more and more into clothing despite whatever size I wear. Back in Fresno, my closets were bursting at the seams with trendy outfits, scarves, jackets and shoes. New York and Company, one of my favorite stores, knew my phone number and would call me if they hadn’t seen me in a few weeks. I had boxes of jewelry that contained long necklaces and gigantic earrings. If my mom was still around and saw my wardrobe back then, she would have beamed with happiness, thrilled that I had finally decided to leave my tomboy stage.
As I look at my closet this weekend, I realize what a funk I’ve been in the last five months. Yuck.
Time to go shopping!
I decide to be a little bold and check out places I usually never go for clothing. I tried Macy’s, Dillards, Lane Bryant, Fashion Bug, TJ Max, Ross and Old Navy, but strike out each time. Finally, being the creature of habit that I am, I find myself at Kohls one of my favorite places to shop.
Now I tend to be a little OCD when it comes to shopping, especially when I have something already planned in my mind. I will not stray from it and will shop for hours…and I mean hours…in the same store, or the same store in a different location until I find what I want and only that. My mother HATED shopping with me and by the time I hit high school she had resigned to just giving me money and dropping me off at the mall for the day.
After four hours (in the same store) I find the perfect shirt, a cute, sleeveless burgundy top with flowers going down the shoulder. Okay, to be truthful, I had found this shirt an hour into my shopping trip. But it took an hour to contemplate the shirt, compare it with other shirts, leave it and then come back to the shirt just to make sure I wanted it. This is why I usually don’t shop with other people. Any normal person would probably shoot themselves after an hour of shopping with me.
So now that I have the shirt, all I need are pants and a cardigan to make the outfit complete. I see a lot of black cardigan and black slacks that would go perfect with the shirt. In fact, it’s the perfect outfit for the interview. But, alas I am a weirdo. I want to be different. I want to stand out. I want to try another color and leave the boring black pieces behind.
I choose charcoal grey, thinking it would look nice with the burgundy. To be honest, I’m sick of wearing black. Charcoal grey will still make me look professional and it’s a nice change over boring black. Charcoal grey and burgundy: the perfect color scheme. Easy right?
I went to Target, TJ Max, Ross and all the other stores above to find a charcoal grey cardigan and slacks and COULD NOT FIND ANYTHING. You would have thought I was trying to find Noah’s Arc. Everywhere I checked: no charcoal-grey anything. Light grey, denim grey, acid wash, (abomination, these should have stayed in the 80’s where they belong) but no charcoal grey cardigans or slacks. You would have thought the color had been discontinued for the year. It’s as if it never existed for sweaters and slacks. I left a lot of stores pretty frustrated.
At this point, any normal person would have tossed the shirt and started with something else. You see: I am not normal. I had the perfect shirt, the shirt I wanted. I would not stop until I found the perfect slacks and cardigan to go with my perfect shirt.
So I return to Kohls for another two hours. Two hours people! Finally, I come across charcoal grey pants. Hooray! I practically skip into the dressing room, whip off my own pants, slip on the slacks…and they are TOO SHORT.
Now I am tall, and I have long been over that fact since I was 10 and realized that I was to live out a life of gianthood, but being tall and pants/jean shopping is awful. Every time I shop, I come across Medium and Average and hardly any Long or Tall. And if I do find a Long or Tall, it’s either a size bigger or smaller than my own. Drives me completely insane. I could attempt to wear these slacks and just wear them low on my hips, but then I run the risk of looking like this idiot:
At this point I am ready to scream. I go out on the clothing floor and scour the racks and shelves for tall or long charcoal grey slacks. Nothing. The designer god’s have smote me. I do however find my size in a pair of long dress denim trousers. I reluctantly change my color scheme to denim/ navy and try to find a navy cardigan. Two Kohls, a TJ Max and a Target later- no navy cardigan. By this time, I’m hungry, irritable and very dehydrated. I pay for my items, pretty sure that I’m looking like a zombie. I jump in my car and head back to my house.
Once I get home, I take a good look at my purchases. I realize that a black cardigan that I walked by and some black slacks would actually go really well with the shirt I bought. In fact, I have black ballet flats to match. And a beautiful pair of earrings. If I just pair my black jacket with my black slacks, I’ll have the perfect outfit.
I’m going back on Tuesday to return the denim trousers and grab the black cardigan instead.
And that folks…is why I’m nuts.